Obsessive Onion Ring Dance

Ever get something on your mind? Something that latches on like a retriever on a piece of steak and shakes and worries away until you're ready to beat the crap out of it? Every once in a while that happens to me. And every once in a while it's not one thing, but a succession of things. They don't stay long, but whenever one leaves there's always another there to take its place.

Last night was one of those nights where that happened for some reason. A list (for your reading enjoyment) of stupid things I found to aggravate myself with last night:

1) Mom. Do I really need to add anything more to this topic? I thought not.

2) My sister. I could come up with 42,000 suggestions for solutions to the things she talks to me about, but none of them involve anything she would ever consider doing. They involve long workweeks, dating people she might consider boring, and being a stick in the mud conservative like me. But then that's what makes me happy. I can't imagine living the way she does, and she can't imagine living the way I do. Why does this bother me?

3) So let's say a couple dates for 6 or 7 years, then split because one partner wants to get married and the other doesn't. L says that after that long, the partner who doesn't want marriage has already made his/her position clear by not proposing marriage. What drives me nuts is this: How long before that message has supposedly been communicated? How long does the other partner go on thinking the relationship has a future when the other partner is just along for the ride? This is not a current issue for me and L, but as usual I am worrying 4-5 years down the line. Which is stupid of me because I think both of us have made it clear where we stand on this issue. Still, I manage to let it take up brain power.

4) Does my horse like me? He acts like he does most of the time, but then there are those days.. And yes, I know that he is an animal and that it is all relative to whether or not I am feeding him or protecting him from predators. Still, I wonder if he is happy and whether or not I should send him to a trainer or a boarding facility.

5) Why do I never meet friends who treat me the way I treat them? Or am I missing something vital in the world of friendships? This is not so prevalent among my male friends.. they are always considerate and I never feel like they're being subtly catty. But the women...

That's the abbreviated list. And I woke up this morning to the screeching alarm, in the middle of a strikingly vivid dream. I was in a livestock arena and there were HUGE semi-circular onion rings performing some sort of synchronized dance in the arena. I could even smell them. It was extremely bizarre. I don't even really like onion rings!