An Answer or Two

To Princess, No, I'm not mad at you. I get a little overwhelmed with my life sometimes, but I'm not mad at you. I wish I could help you somehow because I hate to hear you freaking out all the time. I hate to hear that angry/hysterical/hopeless note in your voice, knowing I can't do a thing about it. I don't have what it takes to keep my own troops in order, much less anyone else's.

Just seems like there is so much to worry about, with Mom and the grandparents and how close they are to catastrophe at any given moment. You and lil Muffinhead down there in the middle of Hurricane-land, with a precariously balanced emotional state and no money to set yourself up any kind of future. I feel like I should be able to save the world. I should be able to fix it all.. another little leftover from the dark ages of our lives I guess. It always did seem to be up to me, whether there was anything meaningful to be done or not.

And watching New Orleans fall apart every second of the day is not helping matters. L's sister and her 4 kids are still down there. Nobody knows where they are, and he's really worried. His grandmother is in the area, too, and I don't know what the story is there.

On top of that, gas is 3.25 a gallon at all stations now, and I average 2 tanks a week just going to work. I don't know what I am going to do when it hits $4, which they're saying it will.

I'm just feeling altogether dismal lately. It's not that I'm necessarily depressed or anything.. I'm just really tired and I can't seem to keep my mind where I need it to be. I did get past a few big deadlines at work, so maybe things there will ease up a little bit.. and I do have a trip coming up to look forward to. But it's hard to predict what that will be like now.

And today I feel achy and tired, and my sinuses and my eyes are burning. I think it's my allergies kicking in again, but then we did have a case of West Nile in SC this week, and I am a mosquito magnet.

But I feel like I'm whining. I'm going to shuffle off to the couch now.